Tortured Soul
by LermanAddictx3
Summary: AU/All Human/OOCness. Edward's Getting Abused. Bella lost a Boyfriend. what happens when two Tortured Souls meet?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: i do not own Twilight.**

**AN: ermm... yeah, so this is like my second fic, and guess what happened? my laptop started to fall apart on me. so yeah, my grammar sucks, i thought of this while sleeping on my parents bed, and i'm doing good in school. 3 random pieces of information for you there. and, there are going to be a lot of own characters in this fic. don't hate me for it.**

**sorry for OOCness, i hope you enjoy though**

**xx**

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EPOV.

The belt hit my back again. I tried not to be a wicked boy, sometimes I wouldn't even to anything. They would hit me about 5 times, then, when I'd stop crying out in pain, they would hit me again. I couldn't say I hated them, though. It would be, hit me, then love me. Regular routine. I don't actually remember when this started, all I remember of it starting, was the pain. I've grown immune to the pain now though.

It was the first day of a new school. I hope things will turn out better at this school. Last school, I got bullied in. I got bullied for a lot of things, one thing was; I've never kissed a girl. Not once, being as I didn't want to get too close to people, it was sort of a phobia. I know people would hate me, but I could at least try to make a difference this time. "You're a wicked boy." My mum said while beating me. I glanced around the room. The clock said it was one, as I looked, I found an empty bottle of alcohol. I knew it.

The belt stopped, and I was waiting for the pain. It eventually came; I curled up into a ball, waiting for it to end. When I say I was immune to the pain, I didn't mean it, I'm not immune to the pain. I still can't stand it, I can't stand the pain that comes. I use to scream, but not now. All I can do is let the tears stream, even though they hurt as much as that goddamned belt. Times like this need someone to be there, I need my parents to help me get through later, get through the first day of a new school. My parents use to be supportive, but they changed. I have no idea why they changed. They were fine with every other teenager in the world. Well, they acted fine with them, they'd beat me if they didn't like them.

I looked at the roof, I could hear Carlisle upstairs. This room must've been the house. It had a big glass window on the back wall, well, it was technically the back door, but we never use it. It looked so cold outside. Mind you, I could go out there at this moment in time and feel nothing, literally. That is how numb I go. My grandmother, Elizabeth, use to teach me piano. She said that it would take me far one day. And, of course, it did. I passed my GCSEs with it. Everyone wanted me. It was like being famous, but a lot worse. It was worse because my parents would watch with disgust, then when we got home they would beat me. I don't know why though, wouldn't normal parents want their children to do well?

I got up, and walked to my room. It was sort of big with a massive window on the front wall. My curtains were closed, they were a golden kind of colour, they matched my room, which was the same golden colour. My bed covers stood out a bit. They were dark blue with fish on them. I know, it's not the sort of thing a 17 year-old boy would have, but what part of my life was normal? I can't stand up to my parents for god's sakes. I looked at the clock in my room, it was only quarter passed one. I went and laid on my bed, I put some earphones in. soon enough some soft classical music started playing. I preferred this kid of music to be honest. Not all that trance music that's around these days. Slowly, I drifted into the blackness of sleep.

I woke up to a random rap song. I forgot to turn off my iPod last night. Then I noticed that I was still dressed from the night before. I got up, my back ached as I got up, like it was protesting. I walked to my mirror and examined my back. I could already see the bruise. I sighed; today was going to be the worse day of my life. No, it will be second, first worse day was when grandma Masen died. She died of some Spanish disease.

I looked at my clock, it was only five o'clock. I then looked around my room, I could sense that something was missing, but I couldn't be sure what it was. I could hear my father snoring in the room next door. I knew that they'd beat me if I woke them. I didn't even want to know what they do in the nights. I've always got my iPod on in t he nights. Well, when I'm not with them, which is surprisingly very little. I went and sat on my bed; I turned on some classical music and started to think, about nothing in particular. One question that crossed my mind is, 'is there life outside that I want to be part of?' I hated questions like that but they're so true. I've never had the option of life outside, would I like it when I finally get it? Would people make fun of me here? Do people actually have better lives than I do?

Well, that was an obvious yes. A tree would have a better life than I do. It's not fair. I should be a normal teenage boy. I was brought out of my thoughts by my parent's bed springs moan as they got up. How long had I been thinking? I looked at the clock, it was only half five. Man, I knew I should've gone to sleep. I fell back onto my bed. What if there was a whole new world waiting for me in school today? Would I be able to grab it? Or would I just let it slip through my fingers?

Would I make friends? Would I be punished for making friends? These questions will have to wait to be answered. Suddenly there was a knock on my door. "Edward, I'm going to work, tell your mother when she get's up." All dad said to me these days.

"Okay, I'll tell her." I said, emotionless. That's what he wanted an emotionless son. They wanted a daughter. If they ever had one they were going to call it Lilly-May. I sort of liked the name; they're still trying so hard to get her. If they did have her, when I turn eighteen, I would take her with me. I'm not going to leave knowing they're child-abusing her. I would take young Lilly as soon as I could. I'll sneak her out of the house, buy a new one out of my college found or something, I might have enough for both a small house and for some local college. I've been saving for about seven years now. I'll get a part-time job, too, so I can buy food and pay a baby-sitter.

There was a possibility that mother was already pregnant with little Lilly. She has been getting fatter. What if it were twins? I can't take care of both. But on the other hand, I can't leave one here. There was a good eleven months till I can leave home. So the kid will be about three months old. At least then I can bottle feed it. I sighed, the hardest part was kidnapping the baby. Why did my plans always back-fire on me? I'm not leaving this house without her. And even if I do, I'll come back for her.

I glanced at the clock, 6 already? I rolled out of bed and went to the kitchen. I looked in the fridge and there was hardly anything there. Well that figures. I was looking around for something to eat when mother walked down, then I found some bread. "Morning, would you like some toast? I'm about to put some on." I muttered, probably to myself.

"Erm… yes please. I really need to go shopping, don't I?" she asked while looking in the fridge. I didn't reply. I put 4 rounds of bread in the toaster. I watched them cook. Mother started talking again, "Edward," she said simply.

"Yes mother?" my nerves started growing, she never speaks to me in the morning unless it was important.

"Edward," she said again before continuing. "I think I'm pregnant with the daughter I've always wanted, and if you get involved with her in any way, shape or form, I swear, I'll kill you." She said it so calmly that it makes me wonder if she ever was a kind, loving mother to me. Probably not, I was the most wicked, mean, hateful boy in the world. Everyone seemed to hate me. No one has ever offered to be my friend, and when I talk to people, they look at me like I have some sort of illness or something. I was always the brainiest kid in school, because I ever had to go out with friends and all that. I moved here from Britain like a week ago. Carlisle got offered a job here, and Esme said she'd like to move to America, and that was that.

I was already familiar with where everything was in the small town of Little Rock. I was going to Little Rock high, one of many high schools in Little Rock. But this was the best of them all. Well, for what I wanted. I was taking AP Biology, English, Music, Spanish, Physical Education and Chemistry. I'm not sure what order they were in. I was brought out of my thoughts by the toaster pinging. I pulled the toast out and buttered it. I took two to mother and ate one myself. I couldn't eat the second one I had lost my apatite completely since she said that, I was defiantly going to run away with that baby. No matter what. I ran up to my room, it was half seven, I had been an hour and a half? Probably all the thinking I was doing. It isn't good that I'm thinking like this. I hoped to find something today, but I'm not sure what. If I could have anything in the world it would be for the unborn Lilly's safety. It might be too late for mine, but I could always worry about her safety.

I looked into my closet to see what I could wear, I had a pair of black skinny jeans or faded baggy jeans. I pick the black skinnies. Well, they weren't that skinny but you had to be on the skinny side to fit into them. I put the first t-shirt I could find, it was a black Iron-Maiden one, with this years tour dates on the back. I went to see them with my cousin for my birthday. That must've been the best night of a long time. My cousin, Roxy, is 19 this year. To me, she's my big sister, she moved with us to America to 'protect' me. She has a night-job, well sort-of, it's an evening job that stretches till 10:30 in the night. When she get's home, she's very tired. She tries to make conversation, but soon gives up and goes to bed. She was the only girl I've let myself get close to. I've always been scared of them, to be honest. I'd never think a girl could be your sun, if you found the right one. I don't believe that she can be the one that brightens your day, either.

I'll never believe that, but I can at least try to fall in love here. I was ready for school in no time at all. I lay on my bed with some Paramore playing, after Misery Business ended, Roxy was knocking on my door. "Edward, we can't be late for the first day in an American school." She sang the last part. She was obviously exited. I rolled off the bed, James Bond style, grabbed my bag and opened my door. Roxy was wearing her usual, three quarter leggings, a mini-skirt, a tank top, and her Poland hoodie that had 'Roxy. Riot' on the back. Well, her jumper was around her waist, it was going to be a hot day, I knew that. We walked to the garage.

In the garage my new silver Volvo waited. I've been driving in it all week. My parents bought it for me, before we even moved her. They could love, just chose not to be. That was their choice, but they shouldn't be taking it out on their seventeen year old son. That's when Esme's words kicked in, 'if you get involved with her in any way, shape or form, I swear, I'll kill you.' I froze. She was planning something, I could feel it. I sensed Roxy by me, but I was too deep in thought to do anything. All I could do now was wait for little Lilly-May to be born, then I'll plan. Her life was more important than my own at this moment in time.

"Lilly-May Masen Cullen, I shall save you, I promise." I whispered to myself. I turned to Roxy, "let's go! Who's driving?" I tried to sound happy, but I knew she'd ask a load of questions in the car, joy.

She pointed at me. So I slid into the driver's seat. Let the fireworks begin.

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**So you like it? don't like it? please let me know. cause if no one likes it i won't type anymore of it.**

**REVIEW ;D**

**xx**


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer - I do not own Twilight.**

**An: sorry this took a while to upload, i got a new Mac, and i took some time to get use to it.**

**and i had to type it up ;D**

**love everyone that reviewed last chapter.**

**And, let me say something, i put Esme as his mother, because it was playing with ideas, i just wanna know where this goes, so i'm sorry if i offended anyone for putting her there.**

**enjoy?**

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BPOV.

A year ago, a year. Amazing isn't it? I've lasted almost a year without him. I'm more shocked than amazed though. I didn't think I could last a month without Riley, let alone a year. Riley is my ex-boyfriend; he died last year, in a very serious car crash. Him and his two brothers were in the car. There was a deer on the road, and when Riley saw it, he tried to go around it, but unfortunately, hit a tree. It was all down hill from there, but neither of his brothers remember anything. For about two months after the accident, I was Zombie-like. They even took me to a therapist.

Well, seen, as the therapist didn't work, my parent's decided that I was going to bring myself out of it. Which happened when it sunk in that he wasn't coming back, never. I had a fit when that sunk in. I feel sorry for Charlie for putting up with me when I was like that. I still can't be with some people. No matter how hard I try. Riley kept me talking to them. Now, I would only talk to Angela Webber. She's like the only friend I have these days. Everyone else ditched me when I was in Zombie-mode.

I liked Angela though. She was interested in most of the things I was. Like, I would listen to music and she'd enjoy most of the things playing. We went to see Green Day gig last Friday.

I stay happy for her; I act like the rich snob that I use to be for her. My parents are extremely rich see. I got whatever I wanted. I must go through a phone every week. I sell my old phones, and most people want to buy them, because I've touched them, and because I leave random numbers on the phone, my parents wouldn't care if I got texts asking for sex. Jessica's and Lauren's did though; it was funny when they found out about it. Anyway, I act like I'm happy; I act like I'm fine. But deep down, I'm dying, slowly; day-by-day I die some more. I hated not seeing him everyday. I know he wasn't perfect, I know he hardly ever kept his promise. One promise he didn't keep was, he promised as long as I was with him, he'd keep himself safe. That was a lie from the start, he always wanted to escape from me. I knew that.

No one else believed it though. At the time we were blinded by his lie, everyone was. I was still blinded by it for about half a year after he'd gone. I'm fine talking about him, now that I know the truth. His brothers tried to convince me that it wasn't true, but after a while spilled everything to me. They said, "it was like you were strangling him with love, he couldn't take it anymore. He didn't want to hurt you like that though!" I laughed at myself. I managed to strangle him with love. He didn't mean to hurt me like he did. Well, that was like saying that carrots could fly. I laughed darkly at myself. I felt like such a whore. I pulled out this week's phone and texted Angela, "Babe, one year. Will my heart ever stop torturing my soul? I still have a massive hole in my heart. I'll try…." I nodded at myself, and sent it. I looked at last weeks phone. Actually, I'll keep the Blackberry Pearl as a second phone.

I looked at the picture on my wall. It was of Ang, Ben, Riley and I. I only kept that one up because of Ang and Ben. I went around my room burning everything that reminded me of him. I burned every picture (except the one on my wall), every letter, every present from him. Every last thing about him gone, every picture on my laptop of him, gone. Every text message I'd sent to myself every phone that I had, gone. The less memories I have of him, the better. Charlie thought I had a multiple personality disorder at first, then my new step-mom, sue, told him what had happened. I was part grateful and part unhappy about that, but what's there to do about it now? I do still cry about Riley now and then, only because he was the guy I wanted to spend forever with, the guy I fell for, the guy I thought loved me too.

Which brings me here. I am in bed, waiting helplessly for Angela to text back. I had hardly slept last night, I was too busy thinking about how nicely the school year would go this year. I've heard that there are two new kids this year. The oldest should've finished school, but can't get a job here unless she has at least a year of American school. I found the fact that they were British quite interesting actually. I would have to learn about Britain. I personally wanted to go to Britain. Just for a holiday. I should ask Charlie and Sue to take me. I was totally wrapped up in thought. Then my phone buzzed, I knew Ang had text me back without even looking at it. I looked at my alarm clock, the bright red numbers said that it was five to four in the morning. I groaned. 'Why get up this early Bella?' my head was screaming to go back to sleep. I rolled over so I couldn't see my picture wall.

I shut my eyes. After a few minutes I figured, I couldn't sleep. I promised myself and Alice that I won't get close to another boy until I knew he was the one. Alice, oh my dear sister, she will never have to see me like that again. Alice is my shopaholic sister. Before I turned into a 'no fun zombie' Alice would take me on her 'feeding my (or mostly her) inner shop monster' shopping trip. Then she would get me dolled up for gigs, dates, revision, anything. She's 19 and 'knows' what boys want. She dolled me up for Green Day. Her words were, "it's good to have you back, Bells." She'd been very excited that I was going out again. I flipped my phone to read Ang's text. It said something about I was going to be fine, then asked about going to see Panic! At the Disco on Friday. I laughed to myself. Course I'll be fine. Apparently, I was always going to be fine. I text back saying yes to Panic! and that I would book the tickets now. After the message had sent, I opened my laptop. I went to the Panic! At The Disco's website. It said that they were performing in Little Rock on Friday the 4th September. It also said that Evanescence and Meg & Dia are guest playing here too. I am SO going to this. For someone with a tortured soul, I wasn't doing so bad. I hated it though, feeling hollow, not knowing why anything was happening. I hated Alice not talking to me, that part of it really sucked to be honest. I would look at her now, and she looks at me, she looks like she's expecting it all to come. I walked to her room. I opened the door a little. She looked so peaceful, like nothing in the world could wake her. I remember once shouting 'Shopping Spree', she woke and ran to the door, the quickest I've seen in my life.

The downside of shouting 'Shopping spree' to Alice is though, she'll take you on one, even if it's 7 in the morning. I felt sorry for Jasper. Jasper is her boyfriend, he was already a brother to me, let alone a brother-in-law. She's so happy with him, it's incredible. I could tell he was getting Alice through my 'zombie-phase'. When she was with him, I could feel the love coming off them. She already got her happily ever after. I loved the fact that everyone in my family got their happily ever after. Renee and Phil, they now have a kid with them, they live in Jacksonville. Alice and I, we do visit them. Little Stephen is the cutest. I want kids, I just don't want to get close to anyone again. I was brought out of my thoughts by Alice's snoring. I smiled at myself and stepped into her room. I placed a note on her bedside table, telling her about the gig on Friday. I knew both Evanescence and Panic! At The Disco were two of her favorite bands at the moment. I snuck back to my room, trying not to wake neither Charlie nor Sue. I felt sorry for Sue's kids, they had to stay in their old house. Which didn't bother anyone seen as they were both sixteen. They are twins, so anything Seth did Leah did, and everything Leah did Seth did. Seth was how I met Riley. It was love at first sight. I fell head over heals for him. I thought he was the one.

I wrapped my arms around my body, my tears were threatening to spill over. I blinked a couple hundred times to keep them back; I now hated Riley Black with the passion. His brother, Jacob, was all right though. He was told me about Riley not loving me. I remember crying loads that day. I remember Charlie saying that I'd finally lost it. I remember being told that I was going to mom. I tried not to remember that day. I pulled myself together. I can't have people knowing how I really felt. It was like forbidden to show any real emotion in Little Rock. I flopped on my bed. What if? What if I fell in love with this Brit? Don't be silly Bella. Your going to act like the High Class Snob you are. I looked at my clock, half six, really?

I looked at my phone, 3 new texts. One from Ang saying okay and she'd pay me in school later. And there were two from Jess. The first one from Jess was funny. It was a photo-message; it was a photo of Lauren's face while reading the text off 'Jacob'. It was actually from me; Alice was in on it too. Alice wrote the text and I sent it from an unknown number. I sent the picture to Alice, who I'm sure would love it. The second text was a sympathy one. I don't need sympathy, actually I never wanted to see his face again. Who would've thought I'd be saying that a year after he'd actually died? I grinned to myself, course I love him, but I hate him more than I love him now. Alice came into my room, she had a smile on her face, she hugged me before saying, "it's good to have you back, Bella." She said that so sincerely, then bounce up and down. "I can't believe your going to see Panic! At the Disco without me!" she pouted then. She's so happy. It makes me happy to see her happy. I hugged her and laughed. I gave her the details for the gig.

I can't believe I'm related to this bundle of joy. The thing is I'm not blood related to her. We adopted her. We adopted her for two reasons; one, she was practically the last one there and two, Sue doesn't want to give birth again. I loved her like my big sister though. I loved her as my short, big sister. We adopted her two years ago. We celebrate the day. Well, Alice and I celebrate the day. Charlie and Sue, let's just say, do other things. The date she joined us was 13th July, it was a Friday 13th, too. That must've been the luckiest day of my life though. It's hard not to love Alice.

This is the moment when people are happy about their life. But me, this is the moment that I burst into tears, tears of sadness, tears for Riley. Alice pulled me onto her lap and let me cry. This was the only way that would calm me. After a while my tears slowed, and eventually stopped. I don't think the hole in my heart will ever mend, but I can at least try to make it go away. "Bella, you're going to be okay. I know it." She whispered, obvious that she had been crying, too. Alice knew practically everything that was going to happen. She was like a psychic, but better. That's when Charlie walked in. He looked at me with upset eyes.

"Time to wake up," he whispered. I loved Charlie with all my heart, I truly did. But it was, like this where I wish I didn't have to be here, like I want to breath my own air, without people reminding me of my dead ex-boyfriend. I sighed and stood up from Alice's lap.

God, this day is going to suck …

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**yay, that sucked ;D**

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**xx**


	3. Chapter 3

**People that read this fic:**

**this may sound really bad, but i'm abandoning this fic for a while.**

**i have nothing to write about and if i did type something it wouldn't be the same.**

**thanks for not killing me**

**i WILL come back to this fic, but give me about a month to read over what i've got and add onto it.**

**love you all**

**Deathwished--x**

**xx**


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